I wanna scream!

Mom died Sept 2010. My sister-in-law cared for her for the last year and 2 mos of her life. I could not do it any longer, which I had been doing for 2 years. During which time, mom had a new TV bought (HD with a USB port). Now that mom is gone, the TV sits in the spare room of my sister-in-law's house. My TV is starting to give me trouble (loud hum and color is getting distorted). I then asked if they weren't using the TV, I could. The USB port would be great for me viewing my videos I need to analyze for school. She said NO, with no reason attached. This is pure selfishness and greediness. I don't get - she was MY mom, not hers. My brother said he has no problem in giving it to me. Why does she feel entitled to everything of my moms. She may have been the POA, but that means she works for the family - she does not become the sole heir to my mother's things.

I want to keep peace, but this is eating at me. Regardless of the principle of this, lets look at the practical part. I can use it, she does not. So it sits there without use, because she is possessive over materials that cross her path.

I do hate to hate. This is not God's way. But she is making it too difficult for me to even like her, much less love. I pray every night asking for strength, and answers in how to approach this. I am letting it go, and will continue to avoid her the rest of my life. Her negative influence is not invited. I have an impressionable 12 year old, and I do not want her to pick up any of her bad habits. I am sure she will not, because my daughter sees how mean and spiteful my sister-in-law can be. When my daughter sees me hurting, she in turn hurts too.

I do not want any of such problems to occur with my dad. I have told dad of this, and he has assured me that she will have no involvement of his affairs after he passes. My dad has a significant amount of $$, and I can just see my sister-in-law getting her claws in it, because her husband (my brother) is one of the two executors of dad's legacy. This has been put in writing - but she will not rest at this. She can be bitter and vicious and will find a way to weasel herself into that situation. Therefore, I will have to tell my dad about the TV situation so he may see yet another example of what her behavior is capable of.

"If thine arm offends thee, then cut it off." I hope I can achieve this by cutting her off of mine and my daughter's life as soon as possible.

My mom would be so upset about this, because she hated waste. She would look at the practicality of the situation and shun the greediness. Sorry mom - she should have never became your POA.